HomeBlogThe Pleasures of Fingering: What Men Really Think

The Pleasures of Fingering: What Men Really Think

I reached out to six men to get their perspective on an age-old question: why do guys enjoy fingering girls? Their responses surprised me, and I must admit, they won me over. It turns out that when done right, fingering can be a pleasurable experience for both parties involved.

The Importance of Good Fingering

Many women have had negative fingering experiences, which have led them to dismiss it as a viable form of pleasure. However, it’s crucial to remember that one bad experience shouldn’t deter you from exploring this intimate act.

These men remind us that when done properly, fingering can be a gateway to open communication and heightened pleasure. They genuinely want to please their partners, and they even practice on fruits to perfect their technique.

Unveiling the Male Perspective

Let’s dive into the insights shared by these men and gain a better understanding of why they enjoy fingering:

1. Testing Arousal

For some men, fingering is a way to gauge a woman’s arousal. They want to ensure that their partner is ready for sexual activity and they pay attention to the natural lubrication as an indicator. If a woman isn’t wet, it suggests she may not be fully aroused, and proceeding with intercourse could cause discomfort.

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2. Assumption of Pleasure

Some men simply assume that women enjoy fingering. They believe it to be a common preference and rely on this act as a primary way to arouse their partners.

3. Arousing Technique

For many men, fingering is a learned technique that they believe effectively stimulates women. They play with the clitoris and insert their fingers, finding pleasure in pleasuring their partners. They genuinely believe that this form of foreplay can bring mutual satisfaction.

4. Learning from Self-Pleasure

Men also engage in fingering to mirror their partners’ preferences. Many women incorporate finger play into their own self-pleasure routines, and men take note of this. By observing and emulating their partners’ actions, they hope to enhance their pleasure.

5. The Finger Test

Some men utilize fingering as a means to ensure their partners’ vaginal health. This “finger test” allows them to detect any unusual odors that may indicate an infection or other concerns.

6. Essential Foreplay

The men I spoke with emphasized the importance of fingering in foreplay and lovemaking. They view it as an integral part of the overall experience, providing pleasure beyond what other forms of stimulation can achieve. They highlight the versatility of the act, as it allows for simultaneous stimulation of various erogenous zones.

The Female Perspective

I also sought the opinions of real women on their feelings towards fingering. While some still associate it with juvenile experiences from their past, many acknowledge that it can be enjoyable if done with care and thoughtfulness.

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According to women, there are common mistakes to avoid during fingering, such as not trimming nails, using too many fingers at once, or rushing the process. Sensuality and a slow buildup are key to a satisfying experience.

In Conclusion

Fingering can be a pleasurable and intimate act when approached with consideration and communication. Both men and women should strive to understand each other’s desires and boundaries to create a mutually enjoyable experience.

Remember, everyone is unique, and what works for one person may not work for another. Open-mindedness, empathy, and a willingness to learn and adapt are crucial for a fulfilling sexual connection.

So, the next time you engage in finger foreplay, keep these insights in mind and explore new possibilities with your partner.

Kiarra Sylvester, MEd, is a sex educator, founder of Black Girl Book Collective, and a prominent voice in decolonizing Black women’s sexuality.

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