Love Island USA is all about wish fulfillment. That’s true for the hotties in the cast, obviously, but it’s also true for the viewers who themselves would love to spend six weeks at a life-size Barbie Dreamhouse nestled on the coast of Fiji, all expenses paid. It’s also wish fulfillment for me, a TV critic who is maybe only paying attention to Love Island USA because I’m paid to… and also, yeah, because I do wish I could visit a Barbie Dreamhouse in Fiji. My wish: I have always wanted to know what would happen if a completely normal, average person was dropped into the hyper-sexualized, highly artificial, incredibly petty, and all-around ridiculous world of beach-based dating shows. Love Island USA Season 5 has granted my wish, and his name is Bergie.
Okay, his name is Carsten Bergersen, which actually makes “Bergie” seem reasonable, and he is by far the MVP of Love Island USA Season 5. Why? Because of how refreshingly average he is. All of the other guys are cocky with perfect teeth, honed pickup lines, and toned bodies. They are all exactly who you would expect to see on Love Island USA and any of its dozens of spinoffs/imitators/competitors/parodies. And then there’s Bergie, who — first off, his name is Bergie! It’s a moniker that practically screams “I’m the elf who wants to crunch numbers instead of make toys.” The other guys are named Leonardo, Marco, Victor, and Keenan. And then there’s Bergie! It’s just fantastic.
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And then there’s the man himself. Bergie looks like the kind of guy who would play a vaguely Eastern European prince in a straight-to-VOD — not even Hallmark — Christmas movie, if the movie was going for a Harry and Meghan thing. As for the bod, he doesn’t not have muscles. If that’s important to you and you’re looking for them, they can be there.
Bergie is absolutely a real-world 7 — like, a South Dakota 8 and a New York 6. But he’s also a Love Island “Huh?” What matters most about Bergie isn’t physical looks. It’s Bergie himself, the man and myth, that matters most.
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Every single time Bergie offers a new fact about himself, he just becomes more fascinating and endearing — and it also makes you wonder if his presence on Love Island USA isn’t part of an elaborate challenge. Bergie is from Cottage Grove, Minnesota (pop. 40,000) and currently lives in Madison, South Dakota (pop. 6,000). He currently works as the manager of a Dairy Queen. His mother died when he was four and, upon turning 18, he was given a stack of letters that she wrote to him before she died. Maybe Bergie is Hallmark material after all??
It doesn’t stop there. Bergie was raised by his grandparents and his single dad. Bergie has never shared a bed with a girl. Bergie has, from what I inferred, only kissed one (1) other girl prior to coming to Love Island. And according to his official, Peacock-provided bio, Bergie’s dad and grandfather also went by the nickname Bergie. Bergie grew up in a house with two other Bergies. And now he’s in a villa, sharing a bed with two women he literally just met!
Bergie’s presence on Love Island USA gives this season a real Jury Duty vibe, for those of you familiar with Freevee’s surprise, everyone’s-an-actor-except-one-rando-average-dude sitcom hit. The show keeps dropping Bergie in what can best be described as Van Wilder-esque situations. Bergie sleeps with two hot babes! Bergie makes out with multiple women during a game! I’m begging Love Island to keep Bergie around long enough to participate in a toga party.
What’s great about all of this, though, is how Bergie’s being treated. Love Island is getting lots of mileage out of dropping this fish so far away from water, but the rest of the Islanders are bending over backward to make Bergie feel welcome. He’s initially paired with Anna, not by choice. They’re the leftovers. But instead of being bummed out, Anna talks to Bergie and gives him tips on talking to girls!
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And when Bergie, freshly eliminated from the competition and re-entering in a twist, gets in a hot tub with incoming bombshells Hannah and Carmen, they all… really chat. And they actually connect. And then Bergie becomes one of the guys Carmen is seriously considering pairing off with because Bergie seems genuine. It pays to be the average dude!
The best moment, though, comes when the other guys find out that Bergie has kissed way, way fewer girls than his bunkmates. The guys don’t tease Bergie or even playfully razz him. They teach him how to kiss.
Victor, the Jason Momoa lookalike, shows Bergie where to place his hand and how to stack his lips with hers for optimal smoochage as the other dudes cheer this on. There’s no “no homo” nonsense and no one comes for Bergie’s masculinity. This is wild and welcome.
Unless there’s an infinite number of twists lined up specifically designed to keep Bergie in the villa until Day 38, as if the show was Bergie’s own very horny Truman Show, it does seem like Bergie’s time is limited. Carmen, the girl he really connected with, chose to pair with Victor, thus leaving Bergie vulnerable. And knowing how these shows go, Bergie’s wholesome, clueless charm will ultimately lose out to a tattooed “brand ambassador” who can pop his pecs in rhythm to any Weeknd single, just name one. But for at least a few episodes, we got to see what it’s like for a regular dude to fall asleep in the break room of a South Dakota Dairy Queen and wake up in a Fiji dreamhouse filled with hotties.
Source: https://t-tees.com
Category: WHY
