Abigail and Nabal are one example of marital neglect in the Bible. 1 Samuel 25 tells us that Abigail was discerning and beautiful, but Nabal was harsh and badly behaved. His very name meant “folly.” Abigail, however, was wise and capable despite her husband’s neglect. She handled a dangerous situation Nabal created in a way that saved lives and eventually ended with her becoming David’s wife, after Nabal’s sudden death.
Neglect is to be taken seriously. Emotional abuse is different than physical abuse, but equally damaging in a different way. This is not the way a husband is instructed to treat his wife.
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How should husbands treat their wives?
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The Bible is full of advice on how husbands should treat their wives—essentially, with love and respect.
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.”(Ephesians 5:25-29)
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Husbands are to not only spend time with their wives, they’re to “wash them with the word.” meaning to cover them in Scripture. To do so means Scriptures must be read and discussed in the home. This could be via a family devotion or simply talking about the Word during dinner.
“And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?” He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”(Matthew 19:3-6)
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