In years gone by, one unyielding lesson was instilled in me from an early age – never hit a girl. My father was passionate about this principle. “Son, you never hit a girl. No matter the circumstances, you must never lay a hand on a girl,” he would affirm. He likened it to being a bully, but worse. It was perceived as ungentlemanly, unmanly, and, above all, cowardly.
Recently, my daughter asked me a thought-provoking question: why do some men resort to violence against women? I found myself somewhat stumped for an immediate response. Could it be that they were never properly educated about respect and equality during their upbringing?
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But what constituted proper behavior in the 1940s and 1950s might not necessarily hold true today. In fact, it may not have been proper even back then. Attitudes evolve, and the dynamics between men and women have undeniably transformed since I was taught what it meant to be a man.
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For instance, my father also emphasized the importance of never fleeing from a physical altercation. He believed that running away would only exacerbate the situation. In fact, he threatened me with a second punishment if he ever caught wind of me escaping from a fight. However, it was important to note that these words of wisdom applied solely to clashes among boys. When it came to girls, an entirely different set of rules came into play.
If a boy were to strike a girl, rest assured someone would inform the teacher. Subsequently, the boy would be escorted to the principal’s office, enduring a well-deserved disciplinary reprimand. It was equally unacceptable to engage in rough play with girls during recess. If a boy’s overzealousness during a game led a girl to shed tears, he would find himself in a heap of trouble. Understandably, some girls were remarkably resilient, while others would burst into tears at the slightest provocation. Nevertheless, there was no room for negotiation – boys simply did not harm girls.
All boys of my generation quickly learned that making ill-advised remarks or acting on impulse came with consequences. In addition to the clear instruction against striking girls, we were also taught that it was wrong to target smaller boys. Such conduct was the hallmark of a bully, and bullies were held in contempt. The societal stigma surrounding bullying acted as a deterrent, ensuring a modicum of restraint. Heaven help us if future generations erode this stigma, or worse yet, begin to admire bullies.
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Girls, on the other hand, were encouraged to embrace a ladylike demeanor. They were expected to play half-court basketball, refrain from using profanities as frequently as boys, abstain from opening doors when a boy was nearby, and uphold a commitment to celibacy until their wedding night.
Undoubtedly, gender roles and prevailing attitudes have undergone significant changes over the years. We like to believe that these changes reflect progress and the advancement of civilization. However, one area where notable progress has yet to materialize is the eradication of men’s violence against women. Domestic violence must be openly addressed, and the judicial system must take a firm stance against it.
Yet, in addition to these measures, we must renew our efforts to teach boys the inherent wrongness of striking girls. Children must be taught to respect themselves and others from an early age. It is imperative that boys who hit girls, and those who grow up to inflict harm on women, be labeled as nothing more than bullies and cowards.
Only through a concerted approach that combines education, awareness, and strong legal consequences can we hope to eradicate the scourge of violence against women. Let us work together to shape a future where respect, equality, and compassion prevail in all human interactions.
Source: https://t-tees.com
Category: Blog
