Many people, especially those who aren’t mothers, still believe that being a stay-at-home mom is an easy role or isn’t as hard as it seems. This notion has even caused some to ask, do stay-at-home moms really need a break?
The answer to this unfortunate question is yes. Stay-at-home moms need a break too.
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Being a mom is a demanding role and is considered more than a full-time job. According to a study conducted in 2018 by the juice company Welch’s, being a mom is equivalent to two and a half full-time jobs!
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Do stay-at-home moms work?
And for those who question, do stay-at-home moms work?
Welch’s surveyed 2,000 American moms with children ranging from ages 5 to 12. The survey found that moms spent an average of 98 hours per week performing parent-related tasks.
The study disclosed that the average mom’s day starts at 6:23 a.m. and ends at around 8:31 p.m for an average of a 14-hour workday.
What It’s Like to Be a Stay-at-Home Mom
Being a mom is a challenging role in general and involves doing what it takes to care for your children. Being a mom is getting thrown up or pooped on, spending many late nights with your child who is projectile vomiting, dealing with lice, pinworms and hand foot and mouth disease and so much more.
And although I am incredibly blessed to be able to stay at home with my kids, being a stay-at-home mom is that much harder because it can be overwhelming and isolating.
Yes, being a mom is hard work, but being a stay-at-home mom is twice as hard. As a SAHM, I spend most of my time with my kids. And because my life revolves around my children, sometimes I unintentionally forget what it means to be my own person.
Kids, especially at the newborn, infant, and toddler stages, require constant attention, making it difficult to step away to catch my breath. My day-to-day is unpredictable. Some days are great, and some days my kids turn into gremlins. It’s hard to do anything alone or get anything done without being interrupted or screamed for or someone tugging at my leg. But that’s all part of the gig I signed up for, and I wouldn’t change it for anything else.
Benefits of Being a Stay-at-Home Mom
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Before becoming a stay-at-home mom, my kids were in daycare- and I am not afraid to admit that I have had more than a few bad experiences. My daughter would come home with dried snot smeared all over her face, soiled diapers with dry feces, and one time my husband picked her up in the playground with a small rock in her mouth!
After the experiences I had with my son in daycare, from them feeding him the wrong food, to having staples on his classroom floor, to them not bothering to call me when my son had a fever, I knew it was time for me to transition from a working mom to a stay at home mom.
4 Perks of Staying Home With The Kids
1) It’s important to keep my children innocent for as long as possible.
As a stay-at-home mom who wants to keep her children from being exposed to certain things for as long as I can, being home with my kids gives me a say in what my children are exposed to and I can for the most part control what influences them.
2) I have a total say in my kids’ day-to-day care.
I am mostly happy that my kids no longer have to stay with wet or soiled diapers for too long.
3) I feel better knowing that I can protect my children to the best of my abilities.
4) I get to spend time with my babies.
The infant and toddler stages are temporary and goes by at the blink of an eye. No matter how hard being a full-time mom is, the amount of time I get to spend with my kids is priceless. I do miss working and interacting with other adults on the day-to-day. Nonetheless, considering my experiences with someone else caring for my children, I view being a stay-at-home mom as a total privilege.
Why moms need a break
We often hear the cliche “you cannot pour from an empty cup,” and that’s exactly the case for moms.
No matter how busy life may get with the kids or how many uncompleted tasks you have on your to-do list, if you are going to show up in the best version of yourself every day for your kids, you need to take time off.
The time off is necessary for you to replenish your energy, take care of your physical, emotional, and mental needs.
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What happens when a mom never gets a break?
Without a doubt, being a mom is a rewarding and fulfilling role. Being a mom is about raising healthy, kind, responsible, and loving children who will contribute to society and the world in a positive way. But sometimes, momma needs a break!
When a mom can’t find a way to take a break, mommy burnout is something moms can experience.
What is mommy burnout?
The constant demands of being a mom can lead to stress, leading to mommy burnout. Mommy burnout is the physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion that comes with the excessive pressure of being a mom over an extended amount of time.
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Mommy burnout happens when a mom is so drained and overly exhausted that she struggles to provide physical, mental, and emotional support to her children.
Possible Signs of mommy burnout
- Feeling extreme physical and mental exhaustion
- Feeling emotionally drained
- Short-tempered or intense reactions to minor issues, including harsh punishments toward your children
- Sadness, irritability, or anxiety
- Feeling mom guilt for wanting a break
- Feeling resentful towards your children or spouse
- Feeling like “you’re never good enough,” or that you’re a bad mom, or that your children deserve someone better than you
- Withdrawing, isolating, or feeling disconnected from others, including your children and spouse
- Feeling like you need more than just a break (more like an extreme desire to be away from your children)
- Regretting having children
- Low energy
- Sleep problems
- Changes in appetite
- Social fatigue or needing to be alone often
- Feeling hopeless
- Lost of interest in things you once enjoyed
- Difficulty controlling your worries
- Being hostile or displaying anger quickly towards your children or spouse
How to get a break as a stay at home mom
All moms, especially those who stay at home with the kids all day, need and deserve breaks.
The key to making sure you as a mom get breaks throughout the day consistently is to be intentional about blocking out time and making an effort to take that break.
According to the study conducted by Welch’s, most moms know what they need to help them get through the everyday demands of parenthood. When asked what they couldn’t live without, they said wine, a constant supply of coffee, babysitters or help from family, Netflix, wet wipes, drive-thru meals, tablets, toys, and healthy snacks.
5 other ways to get a break as a stay at home mom
1. Start your day early
Waking up even half an hour before the kiddos will give you some time to get a headstart on your day. Taking a shower and eating a power breakfast will provide you with the energy to get your day going.
2. Take a mid-morning break
After running around all early morning, getting the kids ready for the day, dropping them off at school, playing, and putting the little ones down for their first nap, this is the perfect time for a reviving break. Use this time to watch a favorite show, read a chapter in a book, catch up with a friend, check your social media accounts, or even eat a scoop of ice cream!
3. Get Outside
Getting outside provides fresh air and sunlight, which can be refreshing. Sunlight can also help with depression. You can also use this time outdoors to get your steps in and get a change of scenery. Your kiddos get a chance to release all that energy they have accumulated throughout the morning.
4. Don’t fuss too much over house chores
House chores are never-ending. Do the best you can, and don’t fuss over not getting everything done. But most importantly, know when to stop, or you’ll work yourself to the ground.
5. Keep the kids on a schedule
For your sanity’s sake, keep the kids on a schedule. Keeping the kids on a routine is not only beneficial for them but it can also be a way for you to block out time to care for your physical, mental, and emotional needs.
Final Words On Do Stay At Home Moms Really Need a Break?
There is nothing wrong with needing a break from the kids or your mommy duties. You don’t need to feel like you want to be with your kids every day. You actually NEED to take a break from the kids if you’re going to show up in the best version of yourself for your children every day.
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