Teachers can have a big impact on kids. And usually that’s great! But when your child is having trouble with a teacher it can be very upsetting. Trouble with teachers can leave kids feeling hurt or anxious. Kids might worry that their teacher’s frustration means they’re a bad kid or a bad student.
Kids with learning issues often hear feedback as criticism. For example, your child’s teacher says: “Your essay had a lot of great ideas. But it seems like you had some trouble organizing them.” Your child hears: “This essay was a mess. You’re a bad student.” Learning issues, anxiety and ADHD can also lead to real problems at school. Behaviors like forgetting to hand in homework or acting out in class can be troubling for teachers. And kids may sense their frustration.
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Parents can help by taking kids’ troubles seriously and helping them build skills to manage the situation. If your child is having trouble with a teacher, listen and validate their feelings. For example, instead of saying, “ I’m sure she likes you!” try: “That’s such a hard feeling! I’m glad you told me.”
Once your child is comfortable, help them reflect on the situation. Asking gentle, guiding questions can help. For example, “How did that make you feel? “Why do you think that happened?” “Has that happened before?” Help your child understand and name their feelings. For example, if your child reports their teacher called them out in class for being loud, you could say, “I wonder if that made you feel embarrassed.” Giving kids space to talk about how they’re feeling will help you, and your child, understand more about what’s going on.
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When you and your child are ready, work together to make a plan. Help your child use their self-awareness to think of solutions. For example, if your child got in trouble for talking to a friend in class you could say, “I noticed that Mr. Tan often tells you to quiet down when sit with Jayden. What could we do about that?”
Work out a script your child can use with their teacher next time there’s a problem. For example: “Drawing helps me stay focused. I know it doesn’t look like I’m paying attention, but I am.”
If your child has an ongoing issue with a teacher, reach out and ask to meet. Let the teacher know how your child is feeling. Be patient. Make sure the teacher knows that you’re there to find a solution, not just vent. Asking questions can help. For example: “What accommodations might be helpful?” “Are there any interventions we can try at home?”
Source: https://t-tees.com
Category: WHY
