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Why is My Clit Not Sensitive?

Sensitive Clitoris

Question:

I’m an 18-year-old female and not too long ago was diagnosed with vaginismus after attempting and failing to have penetrative sex with my boyfriend. Since I was 14, I have tried masturbating, but my clitoris has no/very little sensation and can’t seem to get aroused, let alone orgasm, which I think is called clitoral atrophy.

I have a very liberal attitude toward sex and pleasure, so it hurts me that I can’t experiment and experience it, especially since I’m still young and have a boyfriend with a high libido. On the surface, this seems like a very small issue, I guess, but I developed severe depression and body dysmorphia because I didn’t feel ‘woman enough,’ and my friends have always been vocal about how ‘amazing’ masturbating and orgasming is. I’ve cried myself to sleep regularly because I know that I’m missing out on one of the greatest gifts to life… I sound dramatic, but please don’t laugh. My boyfriend of 3 months says he’s supportive and claims to possess the patience of a Buddha, but I can tell he’s frustrated, which makes me feel even more worthless. Any ideas as to how to overcome these hurdles will be greatly appreciated.

Answer:

Firstly, it is important to acknowledge the emotional toll that this issue is having on you. Your feelings are valid, and it’s crucial to address both the physical and psychological aspects of your experience. Seeking professional help is highly recommended, as it will provide you with the guidance and support needed to overcome these hurdles.

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Start by consulting a GP you trust. Discuss your experience and feelings openly, allowing them to examine you and ensure there are no underlying skin conditions that may be affecting your clitoral sensitivity. Additionally, a gynecological assessment can help identify any potential hormonal causes that may be contributing to the issue.

Vaginismus, the condition you were diagnosed with, is often a result of overactive pelvic floor muscles. These muscles contract and shorten, leading to pain and discomfort during attempted penetration. It can also impact sexual response, including clitoral sensitivity. To address this, consider visiting a pelvic floor physiotherapist. They specialize in helping individuals relax their pelvic floor muscles through various techniques, including trigger point therapy. They may even provide vaginal trainers (dilators) to gradually assist you with achieving penetrative sex once you have learned the relaxation technique.

Remember, overcoming these challenges may require a team of health professionals, each specializing in different aspects of your care. By seeking the appropriate help and support, you can work towards achieving pleasurable sexual intimacy over time.

Comments:

It’s unfortunate to hear about the struggles you are facing, but it’s important to remember that you are not alone. Many individuals experience similar challenges and seek help to overcome them. Opening up to a GP and seeking the appropriate medical advice is a great first step towards finding a solution.

Additionally, it might be beneficial for you and your partner to engage in open and honest communication about your desires, concerns, and boundaries. This will not only help alleviate any frustrations but also foster a deeper emotional connection and understanding between you.

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Lastly, remember that everyone’s journey is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all solution. Be patient with yourself and try not to compare your experiences to others. Focus on self-care, self-love, and exploring alternative avenues of pleasure that may not solely rely on clitoral stimulation. With time and professional guidance, it is possible to find intimacy and satisfaction in your sexual experiences.

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